February 23, 2019
  • 1:37 pm Halloween Photo Drop
  • 4:35 pm Heartiversary Celebration
  • 4:32 pm Fontan Clinical Studies
  • 4:18 pm Tomorrow is Holden’s Heartiversary
  • 4:14 pm The Runner with the Broken Heart

Exactly 2 years ago today Holden wasn’t “acting quite right” and so I made an appointment at the pediatrician’s office. From there, we were told to keep him calm until the ambulance arrived. It seemed like forever before it came, and it was the longest ride from Bridgeport to Morgantown I’d ever taken. At the hospital, I followed the EMS as they bobbed and weaved from the ER through corridors and elevators, up to the 6th floor— the pediatric intensive care unit. It was there that they left me in the lobby. I waited there for hours. During that time Dustin met me with our overnight bags. Our friends came to sit with us. Fortunately, my friend was working the NICU that evening, saw Holden’s name on the PICU roster, found us, catered to my nursing mother needs, and made sure we were fed.

At the end of the night, the attending physician pulled us aside at a cafe table in the waiting area to tell us about Holden’s congenital heart defects (CHDs). It was like an anvil had fallen on us. Eventually we were escorted to Holden’s room. There was his tiny, 2 week old body lying there, still, in the bed.

We didn’t realize it then, but if we hadn’t have brought him in when we did, we would’ve lost him. His heart was failing.

I’m always so thankful to the nurse practitioner who identified his murmur and took immediate action (she’ll say she was just doing her job). It may sound like nothing, but I’ve talked to other heart moms who have gone to their pediatrician, just to be sent home, and have had to do emergency CPR on their tiny infant. So, it is a big deal.

I know that God pointed us towards the right pediatric group back when Corbyn was born, which has several locations, and then pointed us to the right location for our exact need at that moment. I’m also thankful that God allowed Holden’s heart failure to present itself with a “blue spell” in front of the NP, because otherwise it may have been harder to identify.

I’m also thankful for all of the little details God put into place for that day. Like the fact that my in-laws were in town, on their way back home, and were able to turn around to watch Corbyn; and that my MIL’s first chemo without the harsher med that made her the most sick happened to be that day.

Also, that Dustin worked just around the corner from the office where we took Holden, so that he could be there with us for that appointment— one we will never forget.

Today, on this 2nd anniversary of Holden’s diagnosis we went to the playground, enjoyed the sunshine, and ate Cracker Barrel with the whole family. As a passerby, you wouldn’t know that 2 years ago we had one of the worst days of our lives, or that we almost lost Holden. We are also thankful to God for that. His mercies are new every morning, and every day is a gift.

Meghan

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